Axiom #12

There is no such thing as an iTouch made by Apple. They make an iPod Touch, but not an iTouch.

Axiom #11

Just because something starts clean, doesn't mean it can't be bloated up.
"A batteries included Lua installation on Windows." took a 230k tarball to 18MB.

Axiom #10

There is much honor in attaining root. Even on a DROID.

Axiom #9

I watched Riverworld, and I want my four hours back. I then watched Balls of Fury. Samuel should not pick movies anymore.

Axiom #8

I would rather have a blazing fast iPad that can do all of the "fun" things I want to and most of the "work" things I want to, than a slow netbook that can do all of both at a snail's pace.

Axiom #7

If you override a Collection class and add a TotalCount property that returns the value of the Count public property, well you should probably be shot. Possibly water-boarded instead, but that would depend on how fast and good your explanation of this is.

Axiom #6

Trust the intuition of your developers. If Pizza Hut did, they would have taken online orders ten years ago.

Axiom #5

There are some rather shocking developers who don't understand the POLA

Axiom #4

If you think you have read the stupidest thing ever then:

1.You must be reading comments on a news story or blog

2. Keep reading they get stupider the further you go.

Axiom #3

If an integer fails to parse in the woods, and no one is around to hear it fail, it DOES raise an exception.

Axiom #2

Samuel Warren does not purposely go on to slick surfaces for the sake of amusement or fun. If Samuel does go on slick surfaces for fun, it will include some sort of anti-slip shoes of some sort, which basically means that it's not really slick anymore.

Axiom #1

Axioms of Samuel Warren apply to Samuel Warren. They may apply to other people too, but there's no guarantee.